UUUGGGHHHAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH

Yup that is how I feel right now. As some of you know (some might not) we are losing our house. Yes, I've been very depressed and sad about it but its the way life happened for us. I got laid off and then couldn't afford our payments. Chase wasn't willing to help us out with any programs and because the economy was so bad no one could help us out financially (programs, friends, family). So, we had to pack up our belongings and moved ourselves to Washington. We felt like it was kind've a blessing because we felt like we needed a change and Aaron needed to go to school and it wasn't possible in Utah. So, we sought assistance from a program called "Walkaway Plan" and they've been very helpful. We put our house on the market for 3 months (short sale) and then they sent out a died in lieu of forclousure (help us NOT to forclose). So, Chase has been very rude to me lately calling me and saying that I am being disrespectful to them and I am not coorporating. I understand they are trying to collect a debt (that's what I do for a living) but they are NOT listening to what I am saying. My account is in litigation which means the litigation department is handling it because of the forclosure thing. So, finally the person over my account calls the person helping me at Walkaway plan and tells her I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING over again because we have a different type of loan. So I have to fill out all the paper work and put it on short sale again for 3 months. I think they are just trying to set me up to fail. I really do, I hate Chase and this whole thing. I am so mad that it is giving me a headache.

so anways I just feel awful about myself and this whole thing. I thought it was getting somewhere and now we are back to square one again ... it makes me feel very worthless.

Melissa

I just haven't been in the blogging mood ...

Sorry everyone, I get on here and read everyones blogs but I just haven't had anything in me to post one of my own for a few months. So, what is new???

Well, I got my first commission check from my job this last month. It was nice and I was able to pay off two of our bills. :) Now, my job isn't luxury. I am actually a little intimidated telling people where I work, because I am a debt collector and when I do tell someone I get a look as if to say " oh, you're one of those people." I do feel guilty every day I go home and it does make me sad of what I have to do everyday. However, it's a job, and the only one I've been able to get so far. Someday, I will be able to not work there and either work somewhere else, or finally be a stay at home mom (maybe watching a few other kids on the side). Until that day comes, I am one of those people for now.

Noah went to the doctor a few weeks ago for his very late 18 month check up (he's 22 months right now). He weighs 31 lbs and is 34 inches tall. So, he's in the 95th percentile for weight and 50th for height. I really hope he isn't short when he gets older. I will feel so bad for him. :( He's also decided that he has turned two (he decided this probably 5 months ago) and is a little terror! I mean I love him, but he throws these fits where he bangs his head on the floor. I mean it's hard!!! He is still sleeping in the same room with us. His room is ready except my mom is suppose to finish his curtains (and I have to keep reminder her everyday!!!) and we have to do something with his closets. I also am not sure if we are going to get him a toddler bed or not. He's not even two yet, but he manages to climb onto his changing table (why I ever bought a crib with one attached, who knows, I have YET to use the stupid thing and it was a must have before he was born) and shimmy down the floor. I am hoping by the end of this month he will be adjusted to his new room and finally be away from us. LOL I love him, but having him live with us the same room since October has been difficult.

I am still trying to lose weight. I haven't lost anything. I am a little depressed about it and wondering what is wrong with me. I mean, I haven't been eating bad and I work out and still nothing. Also, I have the worst acne for some reason. all over my chin. It's made me so self conscious and ugly.

I don't know if I am going to venture into selling Mary Kay. My friend, Jennie, is selling it and pitched it to me (I've been to a "party" with my friend, Sariah, before but wasn't interested at the time because I was 19 and didn't want to spend the money). It's really interesting and I can get my products 50% off my entire life (I'd only have to sell 200 dollars a year). I just have a couple of hiccups. I don't know how I'd do it because I don't know many people. I know that it's suppose to get you to be able to approach people and sell to them and referrels and stuff but also I have such bad skin right now, who would want to buy anything from me. I know if someone was pitching makeup to me I'd except their face to reflect the product. I don't know has anyone here sold Mary Kay or is selling and what was their experiences?

Aaron is still doing the school thing. It's his second sememster and doing so well. I'm proud of him and what he's accomplishing. I wish he would have started this sooner though!!! :)

Our anniversary is in two weeks (april 17th). We are going to celebrate at the Melting Pot (so DELICIOUS!!!!!) and out on the town. I'm excited.

Well, today it is lik 70 degrees outside and I am going to enjoy the sun a little bit more before it goes away again.

Melissa